Parent and Baby

They say that you can’t buy manners and the image that goes with this is that of a fuming old woman, waving a pointing finger at a troublesome tyke running around in church. But there is no doubt about it that misbehaving kids can cause quite a disturbance in public places. And if your child falls under this category, you must probably feel embarrased and even incompetent. So, the question is how can you make sure that your child has his very own set of good manners?

Everything varies according to one’s family. It is different from family to family, so how a child will behave in social places will vary as well. Truly so, good and acceptable social behavior takes its roots from the home front. To make sure that your child is primed for any social setting, you must create an environment that upholds the value of respect and consideration for others. The best way to teach little ones these lessons is through your own example. Parents should be the role model because it is very important and your children will emulate you. There must be a match between what you do and say and with what children observe. if there is no match, children will get confused.

Before you can take your child with you to different places, another aspect you will have to keep in mind is your child’s readiness. Parents often think that if they don’t bring their children out, how else will they learn? While experience is indeed the best teacher, you should also be mindful of your child’s personality and temperament. Age also factors in. For example, a 2-year old might not appreciate the idea of going to church, while an inquisitive 4-year old will have endless questions about this particular ritual. it is only when your child reaches preschool age that he will gradually begin to understand.

You must prime and prepare your child and you must tell him what to expect. You will want to go out as a family, but in order to have a peaceful day out, you have to set some ground rules for each place you’re headed to.

The first thing to remember in keeping a Sunday service sacred is appropriateness. You should ask yourself if it is okay to bring your child to church. If you think that your little one will be able to sit through the hour without even fidgeting, then here’s what you can do to prepare him. The reason for hearing mass may not be clear to a toddler, but you can still bring him along. Tell your child to look at what Mommy and Daddy is doing and you can pretend that you’re playing a game where your child must keep quiet and be still. For example, speak to your child in a whisper and he will imitate you. As your child enters the preschool years, he will be more curious about the need to attend the Sunday service. This is when you can explain to your child how the ceremony goes. You can teach him the songs and hymns and tell him when to sit, stand and kneel. At this point, your child will definitely be more observant, so you can now tell him that he has to be silent so that he will not disturb the people around.

Whether you’re dining in a fancy restaurant or a fast food joint, there’s nothing more distressing than watching a child make a mess at the table. So before bringing out yours to his first meal at a restaurant, teach your child the basics. Children best learn through stories, so it’s a good idea to share one which your child can learn from. By the preschool years, a child should be able to sit through an entire meal and use the right utensils. Manners at the table are fairly simple to teach to children at this age, from the proper way of holding the utensils to conducting oneself at the table. You can also instruct your child how to ask for food to be passed, how to say “please” and “thank you” and how to sit with good posture without putting his elbows on the table.

A night out at the movie house with the family will require you to bring along your little one. For first timers, this experience can be both exciting as well as scary. A toddler might be a handful in the movie house, so you will have to tell your child what to expect like it will dark inside but there will be a lot of people and one has to be quiet and pay attention to the movie. Inform your child that you will be there to hold his hand if he will be afraid. A young child may not be able to sit through an entire movie, so it’s important for you to keep a watchful eye and check for signs if he is starting to feel impatient. A preschooler will be easier to handle in the cinema. He can follow instructions such as “keep still and quiet during the movie” or “remain seated so that you will not disturb other people”. Of course, a preschooler may still have some qualms about sitting inside a dark theater, so you will still have to reassure him. You might have a curious preschooler, so you will have to inform him that it is important to watch first and ask questions later.

If you’re caught in a full- blown tantrum in a public place, you’re likely to feel helpless and you’ll do anything to please your child. While promises and rewards can hush a screaming tyke, it is never a good idea to rely on this to insure good behavior. You can use this to shape your child’s behavior. When behavior is not yet in place, you can reward your child by either giving him something material but keep them simple and not grand or you can praise him. Be certain also that the treat you will be giving is something that your child really, really wants. However, keep in mind that you should not allow your child to get used to getting rewards. This should be given intermittently and you should do away with them eventually. The key is really balancing everything. It should not even reach the stage where your child will scream and cry. You should know when your child is bound to act up and it is important to set the rules before you go out. Keep everything in a light and positive note and your child will be more agreeable because the more don’ts you dictate, the more your child will want to break them and test your patience and control.

Instilling good manners in a child at any age is really just a matter of common sense, consistency and consideration. You must present yourself as a role model to your children. If you can show your child sincerity in your actions, then your child will learn how to be on his best behavior.